Get Comfortable with Conflict: Ep #4 of the Collaborative Hardball Podcast
Dear Sisters and Friends,
Conflict is everywhere.
In our homes, institutions, politics, and movements.
In the places where power is being challenged, reclaimed, and renegotiated.
And yet so many of us, especially women, have been taught to avoid conflict, soften ourselves around it, or stay silent in order to keep the peace.
But what if real peace requires something much deeper than avoidance?
What if peace requires courage?
What if it asks us to breathe, listen, speak clearly, and stand firmly in the face of what frightens us?
That is at the heart of Episode 4 of the Collaborative Hardball podcast, inspired by Chapter 3 of my book: Get Comfortable with Conflict.
For this conversation, I am joined by the remarkable Scilla Elworthy, a peacebuilder, author, activist, creator of the Business Plan for Peace, founder of Peace Direct and so much more. Scilla has spent decades working in the field of peace and conflict, including with military leaders, grassroots peacebuilders, and women working to interrupt violence in some of the most difficult conditions imaginable.
She is someone who has lived the work of conflict transformation as a way of meeting the world.
In our conversation, we talk about what it means for women to use the power of negotiation to change the world.
Scilla reminds us that when conflict arises, we often have two basic paths available to us: competition or collaboration.
Competition may escalate injury, fear, greed, insult, or division.
Collaboration asks something much harder.
It asks us to listen to the other person’s needs, even when we are hurt, angry, frightened, or facing someone who is bullying, interrupting, or threatening us.
This is not passive.
It is not weak.
It is not an accommodation.
It is a form of strength.
This is where real negotiation begins.
The world we are living in does not need more domination.
It does not need more performance, posturing, or aggression dressed up as strength.
It needs people who can stay present in conflict without becoming what they oppose.
It needs women who can breathe, listen, speak, and stand.
It needs a New Negotiation.
I hope you will join us for this powerful and deeply timely conversation.
Join the live subscriber conversation
After each podcast episode, I host a live Zoom conversation for paid Substack subscribers.
These gatherings are part of the Collaborative Hardball Circle, a space where we can go deeper into the themes from the book and podcast and begin practicing these ideas together.
Our next conversation (July 29) will explore Podcast Episode 4 and Book Chapter 3: Get Comfortable with Conflict.
We will talk about what it means to meet conflict with more courage, clarity, breath, listening, and heart.
We will also ask how these ideas show up in our own lives, relationships, leadership, work, and movements.
Let’s move toward a different kind of power with our conversations: one rooted in courage, grounded in listening, and led by the heart.
With gratitude,
Susan
P.S. If you would like to explore these ideas more deeply, Chapter 3 of Collaborative Hardball looks at why getting comfortable with conflict is essential for women who want to negotiate with power, clarity, and courage.